FAMILY FUN TOASTER
Every day, your morning routine is the same. Cup of coffee, plate of toast, morning paper. Yawn. It's enough to make you want to curl back into your regeneration cubicle, and disengage your central processor, and engage your alpha-waves for another 86,400,000 milliseconds. You need to inject some excitement into you existence before you endure yet another solar cycle in this mundane fashion.
Let's look at your options: your morning paper won't be any more exciting until they finish work on the Time Portal, allowing enough changes to the time stream to make the news less about Charlie Sheen and more about, say, a giant rampaging Mecha-Bieber demolishing Tokyo. Next up: Coffee - you can ramp up the caffeine, but that'll just make you a jittery and excitable dull guy. No thanks. Well, how can we jazz up your toast?
I know, a daunting task, but let's break it down: Toast is, essentially, bread that's been browned through the judicious use of heat. Sugars develop in the starch of the slice until they caramelize into a delicious golden brown crust. Nice, but that crust is just sort of an even brown. Let's inject a pattern into that vast expanse of dullness. By using metal masks to block part of the heat, we can "print" text and images onto your toast. Now, your toast says, "Bite Me."
Well, if you insist!